Each Friday, at least for the foreseeable future, I will be sharing a blog post from the past. These will be posts from other places that I have retained the rights once again, or from this blog. I hope you enjoy these entries. I know they are ones that have made me smile.
This post originally was posted September 5, 2012.
There are few things in life that drive me as batty as a male that will not follow directions. All of the jokes about men not stopping to ask for directions? They are true. Have you ever watched a man put something together where the package clearly states, “Some Assembly Required”? They take it out of the box and dive right in. The instruction sheet either never leaves the box or gets tossed aside. I firmly believe that there is a synapse in the male brain that does not fire correctly when it comes to reading and following directions. They just can’t do it.
You would think that I would take this into consideration when it comes to our homeschool. I am teaching a teenage male child after all. I should get that he just isn’t going to be able to read and follow the careful directions that I painstakingly provide for him. And making it the personal goal of mine to have him successfully read and follow those directions with exactness this year may very well send me over the edge. The men in white coats are on speed dial and are on red alert to come with the straight jacket I may need before the year is over. You think I am kidding. Let me share with you a moment in our homeschool just this past week…
We were doing a lab experiment with our Chemistry set. Now, as often as I joke about how great it is going to be to get to blow things up, I do have a sense of responsibility. I don’t envision blowing a hole through our roof as something I might enjoy. I like having a home that doesn’t have a non-planned skylight and as much as I love nature, I don’t like inviting it into my home. I do sleep here after all. There are just some things that are better left outdoors.
Anyway, the male child chose an experiment where he would create a toxic substance that turned blue. It was pretty cool and we were impressed with the results. But then it came time to clean up the experiment. Our conversation went something like this:
“So, how are you going to dispose of that toxic substance?”
“I’ll just go pour it down the drain.”
“Ummm…I don’t think so. It says it is toxic and harmful. It reacts to water.”
“So maybe I’ll just go flush it down the toilet.”
Visions of an exploding toilet flashed before my eyes. I knew this was NOT a good thing.
“NO! It says it is toxic and harmful. It reacts to water. I am not going to be explaining to your father why the toilet exploded in the name of science. What does your book say?”
“Well, why don’t you find out and then tell me what we need to do to dispose of this properly? Why don’t we read and follow the directions?”
He gave me a look of a deer in the headlights. Surely I was joking. Read and follow the directions?
“It says I need XYZ chemical and some hydrogen peroxide.”
“Well go get them and let’s get this thing done.”
“I found XYZ chemical, but there isn’t any of the hydrogen peroxide.”
“It’s in the bathroom on the shelf in the brown bottle.”
“How much of each do you add? And do you add it in the tube? Or in something else?”
“The tube I guess. And I need to just add a small granule of the XYZ and then some of the peroxide. Then I shake it up and we can pour it in the toilet.”
Not fully believing him, I grabbed his book to make sure we weren’t going to blow up my toilet.
“It says to pour the chemical in the glass jar with the lid. Then add one small spoonful of the XYZ chemical and some hydrogen peroxide. Place the lid on the jar and shake it until it turns clear. Then pour the solution through a filter to gather any brown flecks and then you can dump the solution down the drain.”
“Ummm…I don’t think so.”
What is it with the male brain? Anyone know? I think I may have a permanent headache this year. I also may end up with a new skylight in my bathroom…